When to Send Save the Dates, Invitations, and RSVPs: Complete Wedding Stationery Timeline
When to Send Save the Dates, Invitations, and RSVPs: Complete Wedding Stationery Timeline
One of the most common questions I hear from Nashville couples: "When should we send our save the dates? Our invitations? When should we set the RSVP deadline?"
After photographing hundreds of weddings, I can tell you that getting the timing right on your wedding stationery matters more than you think. Send things too early, and people forget. Send them too late, and guests can't plan. Mail during the wrong time, and your invitations literally get lost.
Here's the complete timeline for wedding stationery, including the dates you should absolutely avoid mailing anything.
The Complete Wedding Stationery Timeline
Here's the standard timeline that works for most Nashville weddings:
12-14 Months Before Wedding:
Order save the dates (if using)
Finalize guest list
8-12 Months Before Wedding:
Mail save the dates
6-8 Months Before Wedding:
Order invitations
Finalize invitation wording
6-8 Weeks Before Wedding:
Mail invitations
3-4 Weeks Before Wedding:
RSVP deadline
2-3 Weeks Before Wedding:
Follow up with non-responders
Finalize headcount with caterer
1 Week Before Wedding:
Final guest count to venue/caterer
Let's break down each piece in detail.
Save the Dates: When to Send (And When to Skip)
What Are Save the Dates?
Save the dates are early notifications that give guests advance notice to block your wedding date on their calendar.
Standard Timeline: 8-12 Months Before
Send 12 months before if:
Destination wedding (Nashville counts as destination for out-of-state guests)
Holiday weekend wedding (Memorial Day, July 4th, Labor Day)
Peak wedding season Saturday (May-October)
Most guests are traveling from out of state
You're planning during busy travel season
Send 8-10 months before if:
Local Nashville wedding
Mostly local guests
Off-season wedding (November-April)
Friday wedding (people need extra notice)
Send 6 months before if:
Very short engagement
Intimate wedding (under 50 guests)
Last-minute venue availability
When to Skip Save the Dates Entirely:
You can skip them if:
Guest list under 30 people
Engagement under 6 months
Very casual wedding
Everyone is local
Budget is tight (save the money for invitations)
Real Example:
I photographed a couple at Cheekwood who sent save the dates 14 months before their October Saturday wedding. Their guests appreciated the early notice and 90% attendance rate proved it worked.
Save the Date Content: What to Include
Required Information:
Your names
Wedding date
City (Nashville, Tennessee)
"Invitation to follow"
Optional Information:
Wedding website URL
Hotel block information
"Formal invitation to follow"
Don't Include:
Specific venue (in case it changes)
Time (will be on invitation)
Dress code
Registry information
Digital vs. Printed Save the Dates:
Digital (Email or Website):
Cost: Free-$50
Timeline: Can send as early as you want
Good for: Budget-conscious couples, tech-savvy crowd
Concern: Older relatives may miss emails
Printed (Postcards or Cards):
Cost: $100-$600 for 150
Timeline: Order 2-3 months before you want to mail
Good for: Traditional feel, physical reminder
Concern: More expensive, takes longer
Magnets:
Cost: $200-$500 for 150
Benefit: Stays on fridge as reminder
Concern: Most expensive option
The Dates You Should NEVER Mail Invitations or Save the Dates
This is crucial and most couples don't think about it.
Avoid Mailing During These Times:
December 15 - January 5 (Holiday Mail Rush)
Why it's bad:
USPS handles 3x normal volume
Mail takes 2-3x longer to arrive
Invitations get buried in holiday cards
People are traveling, may not check mail
Higher chance of complete loss
Real disaster I witnessed:
A couple mailed invitations December 20th. Half their guests never received them. They had to re-mail in January, causing confusion and extra expense.
If your wedding is in spring and you MUST mail during holidays:
Mail before December 10th, OR
Wait until after January 10th
July 1-10 (July 4th Week)
Why it's problematic:
Many postal workers on vacation
People traveling for holiday
Mail sits unchecked
Delayed processing
Better timing:
Mail before June 25th, OR
Wait until after July 10th
Thanksgiving Week (Week of 4th Thursday in November)
Why it's tricky:
People traveling
Mail not checked for days
USPS reduced hours
Gets lost in Black Friday shopping chaos
Better timing:
Mail 2 weeks before Thanksgiving, OR
Wait until the week after
Memorial Day & Labor Day Weekends
Why it's less ideal:
Long weekends = delayed delivery
People traveling
Reduced postal service
Better timing:
Mail the week before or after the holiday
Tax Day Week (April 10-20)
Why it matters:
People stressed and distracted
Important mail gets mixed with tax documents
Easy to accidentally discard
Your wedding invitations deserve attention. Don't let them arrive during chaos.
Wedding Invitations: The Main Event
Standard Timeline: 6-8 Weeks Before Wedding
This is the sweet spot for most weddings.
Send 8-10 Weeks Before If:
Destination wedding
Holiday weekend
Friday wedding (guests need to request time off)
Summer wedding (people book vacations early)
30%+ of guests are traveling
Send 6 Weeks Before If:
Local wedding
Mostly local guests
Short engagement
Already sent save the dates
Send 10-12 Weeks Before If:
Destination wedding requiring flights
International guests
Very limited hotel availability
Holiday weekend (Thanksgiving, New Year's)
Never Send Less Than 4 Weeks Before:
Guests can't plan adequately
Shows poor planning
Hotel blocks may fill up
Travel gets expensive
Invitation Ordering Timeline:
6-8 months before wedding:
Start browsing invitation styles
Finalize wording
4-6 months before:
Order invitations
Most take 2-4 weeks to print
3-4 months before:
Proofread (multiple times!)
Address envelopes
Get postage
6-8 weeks before:
Mail invitations
Pro Tip from Experience:
I've seen couples at Riverwood Mansion order invitations only 6 weeks before their wedding. Rush fees added $300+ and they had to hand-deliver some because mail wouldn't arrive in time.
What to Include in Wedding Invitations
Must-Have Information:
The Basics:
Host line ("Together with their families")
Request line ("Request the pleasure of your company")
Your names
Date and time
Venue name and address
Reception information
RSVP details
Additional Inserts:
RSVP Card:
RSVP deadline (3-4 weeks before wedding)
Response options (attending/not attending)
Meal choices (if plated dinner)
Pre-stamped envelope
Details Card:
Wedding website
Hotel accommodations
Dress code
Transportation/parking info
Weekend Events Card (if applicable):
Welcome drinks
Post-wedding brunch
Other activities
RSVP Deadlines: The Math That Actually Works
Standard RSVP Deadline: 3-4 Weeks Before Wedding
Why this timing works:
4 weeks before gives you:
1 week for people to respond after deadline
1 week to chase down non-responders
1 week to finalize details with vendors
Final headcount to caterer 1-2 weeks out
The Reality:
Even with a clear deadline, 20-30% of guests will respond late or not at all.
RSVP Timeline:
Invitations mailed: 8 weeks before
RSVP deadline: 4 weeks before
You'll receive:
40% of RSVPs in first week
30% in second week
20% right at deadline
10% after deadline (you'll need to chase)
Week 5 (deadline week):
Compile "no response" list
Start follow-up plan
Week 4 (1 week after deadline):
Text/call non-responders
"Hi! Just checking if you got our invitation? RSVP deadline was [date] and we need to finalize numbers."
Week 3 (2 weeks before wedding):
Final headcount
Give to caterer
Give to wedding planner
Finalize seating chart
Common RSVP Mistakes:
❌ Setting deadline only 2 weeks before wedding (too tight)
❌ Not following up with non-responders (you'll be guessing)
❌ Assuming no response means "no" (always confirm)
❌ Giving caterer final numbers too early (people change plans)
Online RSVPs vs. Mailed RSVP Cards
Mailed RSVP Cards:
Pros:
Traditional and expected by older generations
Physical reminder
Some guests prefer it
Cons:
Costs $1-$3 per card
Postage both ways ($1.20+ per set)
People lose them
Handwriting can be illegible
Takes longer to track responses
Cost for 150 guests:
RSVP cards: $150-$450
Postage (to you): $90
Total: $240-$540
Online RSVPs (Wedding Website):
Pros:
Free
Instant tracking
Easy to manage
Can't get lost
Automatic reminders possible
Guests can update their response
Cons:
Older relatives may struggle
Some see it as less formal
Requires wedding website
The Hybrid Approach (Most Popular):
Include both:
RSVP card for those who prefer it
Website URL for online option
"Please respond by [date] via mail or online at [website]"
What I See Work Best:
Most Nashville couples now do online RSVPs with a mailed card as backup. About 80% of guests use the website, 20% mail the card.
Special Timing Situations
Short Engagement (Under 6 Months)
Timeline:
Skip save the dates OR send 3-4 months before
Send invitations 6-8 weeks before
RSVP deadline 3 weeks before
Expect lower attendance (people already have plans)
Destination Wedding (Nashville for Out-of-Towners)
Timeline:
Save the dates: 10-14 months before
Invitations: 10-12 weeks before
RSVP deadline: 5-6 weeks before
Give guests maximum planning time
Holiday Weekend Wedding
Timeline:
Save the dates: 12-14 months before
Invitations: 10 weeks before
RSVP deadline: 5 weeks before
People book holiday travel early
Friday Wedding
Timeline:
Save the dates: 10-12 months (people need to request PTO)
Invitations: 8-10 weeks before
RSVP deadline: 4-5 weeks before
Clearly state it's FRIDAY on save the date
Intimate Wedding (Under 50 Guests)
Timeline:
Skip save the dates (call people personally)
Invitations: 6-8 weeks before
RSVP deadline: 3 weeks before
Can be more casual with timing
Postage Considerations (Everyone Forgets This)
What Affects Postage:
Square Invitations:
Cost more to mail (hand-cancelled)
Add $0.20-$0.50 per invitation
Weight:
Standard invite (under 1 oz): $0.73 (2026 rate)
Over 1 oz (thick card, multiple inserts): $1.01+
Over 2 oz: $1.29+
Wax Seals:
Require hand-cancelling
Add $0.20+ per piece
Often get damaged in sorting machines
Unique Shapes:
Circles, hexagons = higher cost
May require hand-cancelling
Pro Tips:
Weigh a complete invitation at post office BEFORE ordering stamps
Buy extra stamps (you'll need them for late additions)
Hand-deliver locally if budget is tight
Skip wax seals or use stickers that look like wax
Real Cost Example:
For 150 invitations:
Standard rectangular, under 1 oz: $110 (150 × $0.73)
Square, over 1 oz with wax seal: $180+ (150 × $1.20)
The Follow-Up Strategy for Non-Responders
1 Week After RSVP Deadline:
Create your list:
Anyone who hasn't responded
Organize by: must invite, plus-ones, B-list
Start with texts: "Hi [name]! Haven't heard back on our wedding RSVP. Just need a headcount for catering. Can you make it on [date]?"
If no response in 24 hours, call: Most people just forgot. A quick call solves it.
2 Weeks After Deadline:
For remaining non-responders:
Assume they're not coming
Don't hold spots
Invite B-list if you want to fill spots
Never:
Get confrontational
Complain about their rudeness (even if it is rude)
Make them feel bad
Post on social media about it
What I've Seen Work:
Wedding planners often handle this follow-up, which removes the awkwardness for couples.
Thank You Card Timeline
While we're talking stationery, let's cover thank yous.
Timeline:
For engagement/shower gifts:
Within 2-3 weeks of receiving
For wedding gifts received before wedding:
Within 2-3 weeks of receiving
For wedding gifts received at/after wedding:
Within 3 months of wedding
Ideally within 6-8 weeks
Strategy:
Write thank you notes as gifts arrive, not all at once after the wedding.
Order Timing:
Order thank you cards when you order invitations. Same design, cohesive look, one shipping charge.
Mailing Day Logistics
How to Actually Mail 150 Invitations:
Step 1: Final Checklist (2 days before mailing)
✓ All envelopes addressed
✓ Return address on each
✓ Correct postage
✓ RSVP card has your address
✓ RSVP envelope has stamp
✓ All inserts included
Step 2: Assembly Party
Invite bridesmaids/family to help
Create assembly line
Quality check each one
Step 3: Weigh One Complete Invitation
Go to post office
Weigh a fully assembled invite
Confirm correct postage
Step 4: Mail on Tuesday or Wednesday
Avoid mailing on Friday (sits over weekend)
Tuesday-Wednesday = arrives Saturday/Monday
Never mail on Saturday (post office closed Sunday)
Step 5: Hand-Cancelling If needed (wax seals, odd shapes):
Take to post office
Ask for hand-cancelling
Costs extra but prevents damage
Step 6: Keep One
Mail one to yourself as a test
Confirms timing and condition
Great keepsake
Digital Timeline Management Tools
Wedding Website RSVP Tracking:
Best platforms:
The Knot
Zola
Minted
Withjoy
Features to use:
Automatic RSVP reminders
Meal choice tracking
Plus-one management
Guest list organization
Export to Excel for seating chart
Budget-Friendly Timing Strategies
How to Save Money on Stationery:
Skip Save the Dates:
Send invitations 10-12 weeks out instead
Saves $200-$600
Use Digital Save the Dates:
Email or social media
Free
Send 10-12 months before
Online-Only RSVPs:
Saves on RSVP card printing and postage
$200-$400 savings
Hand-Deliver Locally:
For guests within 30 minutes
Saves postage ($0.73+ × number of local guests)
Personal touch
Postcard Invitations:
Less expensive to print
Cheaper postage
Less formal but trendy
What Happens When You Get Timing Wrong
Too Early (Save the dates 18+ months before):
People forget
Plans change
More declines
Too Late (Invitations 3 weeks before):
Can't take time off work
Already have plans
Expensive travel
Lower attendance
RSVP Deadline Too Close to Wedding:
Caterer needs final count 1-2 weeks before
No time to follow up with non-responders
Scrambling at the last minute
Paying for extra meals "just in case"
Real Wedding Example:
A couple sent invitations 4 weeks before their Union Station wedding. 40% of guests already had plans. They expected 150, got 95. Their venue minimum was 120 guests, so they paid for 25 empty seats.
Nashville-Specific Timing Considerations
Peak Wedding Season (May-October):
Hotels book up fast
Send save the dates 10-12 months out
Mention hotel blocks on save the dates
CMA Fest (June):
Downtown Nashville hotels expensive/full
Alert guests early if wedding during this week
Consider mentioning on save the date
Music City Bowl / NYE (December):
Similar to CMA Fest, alert guests
Bonnaroo Weekend (June):
If wedding near Manchester, TN
Hotels in surrounding areas fill up
Nashville Marathon (Late April/Early May):
Downtown traffic and hotel impacts
Warn guests if applicable
Quick Reference Timeline Cheat Sheet
18-12 Months Before:
Finalize guest list
Order save the dates (if using)
12-8 Months Before:
Mail save the dates
Book venue, photographer, planner
8-6 Months Before:
Order invitations
Finalize invitation wording
8-6 Weeks Before:
Mail invitations
AVOID: Christmas week, July 4th week, Thanksgiving week
4-3 Weeks Before:
RSVP deadline
Start tracking responses
3-2 Weeks Before:
Follow up with non-responders
Finalize headcount
2-1 Weeks Before:
Give final count to caterer/venue
Finalize seating chart
After Wedding:
Send thank you cards (within 3 months)
Common Questions About Invitation Timing
"Can we send invitations 12 weeks before?"
Yes, especially for:
Destination weddings
Holiday weekends
Friday weddings
If most guests are traveling
"What if we don't have our venue finalized?"
Don't send invitations until you have:
Venue confirmed
Date locked in
Time decided
If uncertain, wait to send invitations even if it means sending only 6 weeks before.
"Should we include registry information?"
No. It's considered improper etiquette. Put registry on your wedding website instead.
"Do we need RSVP cards if we have a website?"
Not required, but many older guests prefer physical cards. Hybrid approach works best.
"What if someone RSVPs yes then changes to no?"
It happens. This is why you don't give caterer final count until 1-2 weeks before. Build in small buffer (5-10 extra meals).
When Guests Ask "Can I bring a plus-one?" After RSVP Deadline
If invitation said "[Name] and Guest":
They were allocated a plus-one
They can bring someone
If invitation said only "[Name]":
No plus-one allocated
You can say: "We'd love to include everyone, but we're limited by venue capacity. We hope you can still join us!"
Don't:
Feel obligated to add plus-ones
Expand your budget for last-minute additions
Make exceptions (word spreads)
Final Thoughts: Timing Is Everything
After photographing hundreds of Nashville weddings, I can tell you: couples who get the stationery timeline right have less stress, better attendance, and smoother planning overall.
The key takeaways:
✅ Send save the dates 8-12 months before
✅ Mail invitations 6-8 weeks before
✅ Set RSVP deadline 3-4 weeks before
✅ NEVER mail during Christmas week, July 4th week, or Thanksgiving
✅ Follow up with non-responders 1 week after deadline
✅ Give caterer final count 1-2 weeks before wedding
Don't overthink it. These timelines have worked for thousands of weddings. Trust the process, avoid the bad mailing dates, and you'll be fine.
Ready to Work With a Nashville Wedding Photographer Who Understands Wedding Planning?
At Heck Designs and Photography, we've been through the entire wedding planning process hundreds of times with Nashville couples. We understand the timeline, the stress points, and how to make everything work smoothly.
From helping you plan your wedding day timeline to coordinating with your wedding planner, we're here to make your wedding day as stress-free as possible.
View our wedding photography portfolio or contact us to discuss your Nashville wedding.
Related Reading: